Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Bound to the Law of God

Part Four of a Series on Marriage
Read Part One: How Long Does Marriage Last?
Read Part Two: A Nation of Adulterers
Read Part Three: The "Exception"


What is the basis for the marriage covenant that God instituted? We see in the very beginning that God instituted marriage because of His unique creation of the sexes. When a man leaves his father and mother and cleaves unto his wife, they become one flesh and God joins them together in a lifelong union.

The marriage covenant is not specific to Christians, but was established at the outset of God’s creation of the human race and is equally binding on all marriages between a man and a woman.

We have seen how Jesus upheld the lifelong covenant of marriage in His teaching. Now we will look at Paul’s teaching on marriage.

We first see Paul refer to the marriage covenant in his letter to the Romans:



“For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband. So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man.”

Romans 7:2-3



Paul clearly upholds marriage as established by God in the beginning – as a lifelong covenant that ends only when one of the parties dies.

We next find a lengthy discussion of marriage by Paul in I Corinthians 7. Specifically, we see Paul address a situation where an unbelieving spouse departs from a believing spouse:



“But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.”

I Corinthians 7:15



This departure (or putting asunder) was what Jesus expressly commanded against:



“And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

Matthew 19:4-6 (emphasis added)



Is Paul now saying that the departure of an unbelieving spouse would render the marriage covenant established by God no longer binding? Certainly not. We have already seen that Paul understood the marriage covenant to be terminable only by death.

If someone is “under bondage” to another, they are obligated to follow them wherever they go. They are constrained to do whatever the one to whom they are in bondage requires of them. Numerous places in Scripture, we are taught that those who are bound to earthly masters are as freemen in Christ. Servitude to an earthly master did not exclude one from being a servant of Jesus Christ. And to the extent that the one to whom they were in bondage did not require them to violate the law of God, they were to continue their servitude to that person. Nowhere in Scripture are we taught that we are no longer bound to the law of God.

In the case of an unbelieving spouse who departs, Paul exempts a believing spouse from continued bondage to that person. They are to let the departing spouse leave and are not obligated to go with them. The departure is a physical separation initiated by man, but does not nullify the marriage covenant as instituted by God. The man and woman have become one flesh – joined together by God – and only death will end the union.

The one who departs does so in violation of the law of God. This does not make the law of God any less binding on the one who remains. If anything, the believing spouse ought to be more resolved than ever to remain faithful to their marriage covenant. For while an unbeliever may completely disregard the law of God, believers recognize that the very faith through which they are saved also establishes the law. (Romans 3:31)

Paul wraps up this discussion of marriage by saying:



“The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord. But she is happier if she so abide, after my judgment: and I think also that I have the Spirit of God.”

I Corinthians 7:39-40



So we see that Paul continues, in his teaching on marriage, to uphold marriage as it was originally instituted by God – as a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman.

18 Comments:

At March 11, 2006 5:57 PM, Mrs.B. said...

Hi Natalie! I haven't been here for awhile....I really like the new look of your blog. (o:

I've scanned your posts on marriage and the discussion between you and Adrian...very interesting but it started to make my head spin so I had to start scanning instead of reading every word. (o; Something I wanted to add (please forgive me if you've already covered this and I missed it).

First I must say that I think the divorce rate among Christians is deplorable and I think marriage should be life long. I believe the vows must be taken VERY seriously. Now I can't argue about stuff the way you and Adrian do because, frankly, well, I'm just an average person and you two are VERY smart! The point I wanted to bring up is in John 4:6-18. In verses 16-18 it says "Jesus saith unto her, Go, call thy husband, and come hither. The woman answered and said, I have no husband. Jesus said unto her, Thou hast well said, I have no husband: For thou hast had five husbands; and he whom thou now hast is not thy husband: in that saidst thou truly." If divorce did not end the marriage then how could Jesus say that she hast had five husbands? Wouldn't He have refered to the other husbands like He did the man she was currently living with? If Jesus recognized that she had had 5 husbands then it would seem to me that He recognized all 5 marriages.

Anyway, those are just my thoughts and like I said, I'm no expert. (o:

 
At March 13, 2006 12:33 AM, natalie said...

Thanks for your comment, Mrs. B. Glad to have you back. :-)

Here's a copy of a comment I left on another post:
"Husband or wife is a term that is used to refer even to multiples of such, but does that alone make the marriage legitimate in God’s eyes? In a sense, we can physically “marry” ourselves to another when we are still bound to another man or woman in marriage, but this is defined as adultery, not as the establishment of a new marriage."

Are we to assume that in this discussion with this adulterous woman that Jesus was contradicting what the rest of Scripture teaches us about the lifelong marriage covenant? I don't think so. Jesus spoke plainly in words that the woman would understand and to get right to the heart of the issue in her life. He was not specifically addressing the issue of marriage and divorce as He was the four other times we have recorded for us in the Gospels.

I do think we can learn much from Jesus' interaction with this woman. Jesus acknowledged her sinful life, but instead of condemning her, He offered her salvation. He could meet her deepest needs that she had, up to this point, sought to meet through her relationships with other men. The same is true today. Those who are trapped in a pattern of adultery can find forgiveness and salvation in Jesus Christ. The law condemns them [which is why it is so important for us to uphold the truth of the law and not water it down] and is the schoolmaster that leads them ultimately to Christ, who fulfilled all the righteous requirements of the law on their behalf.

 
At March 13, 2006 1:16 PM, Mrs.B. said...

Thanks Natalie! I figured you all had covered this and that I just missed it, thank you for bringing out what you had already said. I figured that had been covered because I was entering into the discussion very late.

IMO, there is a very dangerous teaching going around that if you're divorced and remarried that you need to divorce your current husband and try to reconcile to your original husband. What a mess that all entails.

A friend of mine just started a blog and she had me write a post (my first post I've ever written) on dog training. If you get a chance, come check it out. The blog is: http://wisewomenblog.blogspot.com/

 
At March 15, 2006 6:24 PM, Maxwell said...

Hello Natalie,

Looks like you've got a pretty thourough series on marriage going here. I've read a couple posts and they are right on, but I have a question for you or Mrs. B. Where did you hear about this?

"IMO, there is a very dangerous teaching going around that if you're divorced and remarried that you need to divorce your current husband and try to reconcile to your original husband."

I have never heard that presented before! Is there a certain group or denomination that is promoting this? How do they support it with scripture?

The other day when I gave you the address for my blog I think that was before I simplified it. The newer one is:

richardmaxwell.blogspot.com

The old one still displays, but it is not up to date, so if you are wondering why I have not responded to your comments, that's why.

If you want to display the link as a button, use the code listed on my blog.

 
At March 16, 2006 11:52 AM, Maxwell said...

It's me again.

Just wanted to let you know, your Rebelution link is now directed at a blog called "My Cool Life" by Jesus_Freek.

You might want to check that out.

 
At March 16, 2006 6:34 PM, Maxwell said...

I just found out that the Harris's are working on reclaiming that url, so it might be back to normal soon.

 
At March 16, 2006 10:43 PM, natalie said...

Mrs. B~

I, too, am unaware of that as a widely held teaching and wonder if there is any attempt to support it with Scripture?

Thanks for the link to your post. I read it - sounds like you're very knowledgeable in the field of dog training. I hope you are able to post some more. Let me know if you do.

Joel~
Thanks for the comment and for letting me know about the linkage issues. I changed the links to your blog and the Harris' blog. Interesting situation there with their domain name...

 
At March 17, 2006 12:35 PM, Maxwell said...

Yes. Very deep discussion on the "My Cool Life" blog!

 
At March 20, 2006 2:18 PM, Mrs.B. said...

Hi Natalie!

I don't know of a particular denomination that teaches this but I've had divorced and remarried friends tell me that Christians have told them that. And also in 'Created To Be His Helpmeet' Debi Pearl printed a letter in which a wife moved out of her and her husband's bedroom because she now realizes that she is living in a state of adultry because she is remarried. The Pearl's advice to her was that whoever she's married to currently is her husband and she should work within that framework. I've also read articles (a long time ago and I can't remember what they were) that promoted that idea. As for the Scriptures they used....pretty much the same ones you did....only they drew different conclusions.

 
At March 20, 2006 4:45 PM, Mrs.B. said...

Natalie and Maxwell:

Here is something I found that represents what I'm talking about. It's REALLY long, and it's in PDF format, so scroll down to page 69. It is the third paragraph and it talks about if you've remarried, the only thing to do is ' repent, and vacate the relationship'. He has numbered everything and it is under his number 70.

http://www.marriagedivorce.com/mdebook.pdf

 
At March 20, 2006 4:51 PM, Mrs.B. said...

Here's another one.

http://www.anabaptists.org/tracts/divorce2.html

 
At March 20, 2006 5:09 PM, Mrs.B. said...

Natalie, I'm not trying to drag this out.....I just checked back with you today and found that you and Maxwell had asked me a question and I'm trying to answer it. Please don't interpret my comments as argumentative because I know you want the debate to be over. (o:

 
At March 20, 2006 10:16 PM, natalie said...

Not to worry, Mrs. B. I appreciate you passing on the info to me.

Thanks for the link to your blog. Looks like you've launched it with quite the collection of posts already. :-) I like the title and theme of it and I'm sure your posts will be inspiring and encouraging, much like the comments you have already been contributing to the blogosphere.

 
At March 21, 2006 10:31 AM, Mrs.B. said...

Thanks Natalie! You're so kind! (o:

 
At April 10, 2006 10:13 AM, Heather Bainum said...

Natalie,
Just read your blog for the first time. Loving it!!! I was very fascinated with you comments on marriage as I have taking a Precepts class on marriage. I missed the last class where they started talking about divorce. A friend of mind who is single and attends the class led me to blieve that they stated the vs Paul used about a believer were freeing them to then remarry. She started this conversation with me because I have been very plan about stating that there is NO reason for divorce. The scriptures state that God allowed divorce in adultery due to the hardness of man's hearts. It was interesting to me that my friend seemed to want to find a way to allow divorce. I did not have an immediate comment to give her when she was using Paul's scripture to allow divorce and remarriage in the case of a non-believer. Do you have any other thoughts?

 
At June 29, 2006 12:11 AM, cindy said...

Hi Natalie,

I just found your site. I have to say that I am quite excited to read the viewpoint you have come to through study. I also came to the same view after intense study of the Word of God.

Since you believe that only death dissolves a marriage joined by God and that a second marriage is adultery (joining with another person's spouse), how does one repent from this adultery? It seemed that you were in agreement that forsaking such a relationship was "extreme", or am I mistaken? I know of quite a few people who have come to the same conclusions of marriage that you have and they have been convicted they would STILL be in a state of adultery if they remained married to the 2nd spouse. What are your thoughts on this? Thank you.

Blessings, Cindy

 
At July 04, 2006 6:05 PM, natalie said...

Thanks for your comment, Cindy. Isn't the transforming power of the Word of God amazing?!

The question you ask is one that has been on my mind a lot lately. In fact, I just received a comment from another woman who came to the conclusion that to continue in her remarried relationship was to continue in a state of adultery. She has posted her testimony here: http://www.mm9.biz/remarriage.html

This is part of my response to her comment: I cannot say that I am to the same place in my understanding of what should be done in light of remarriage as you advocate. I look around and see intact families with children whose parents have been previously divorced and cannot imagine what sort of devastation it would bring to the family for the parents to separate... It seems a very hard situation with no easy answer.
May God grant wisdom and discernment to those in such situations who desire to live holy lives that are pleasing to Him.


I believe it is vital for the church to embrace and teach God's design for marriage - as a lifelong covenant - so that perhaps many can be spared the entrapment and heartache that accompanies the unbiblical practice of remarriage. How much better it is to proactively prevent such situations in the first place rather than have to pick up the pieces after.

Those are my thoughts. :-) Certainly not a conclusive solution to such a widespread problem among Christians today who are already living in remarriages. But perhaps we can begin to make a difference for the generations to come so that they will be able to fully experience God's blessings as they live according to His design for marriage.

 
At July 04, 2006 6:17 PM, natalie said...

Thanks for your comment, Cindy. Isn't the transforming power of the Word of God amazing?!

The question you ask is one that has been on my mind a lot lately. In fact, I just received a comment from another woman who came to the conclusion that to continue in her remarried relationship was to continue in a state of adultery. She has posted her testimony here: http://www.mm9.biz/remarriage.html

This is part of my response to her comment: I cannot say that I am to the same place in my understanding of what should be done in light of remarriage as you advocate. I look around and see intact families with children whose parents have been previously divorced and cannot imagine what sort of devastation it would bring to the family for the parents to separate... It seems a very hard situation with no easy answer.
May God grant wisdom and discernment to those in such situations who desire to live holy lives that are pleasing to Him.


I believe it is vital for the church to embrace and teach God's design for marriage - as a lifelong covenant - so that perhaps many can be spared the entrapment and heartache that accompanies the unbiblical practice of remarriage. How much better it is to proactively prevent such situations in the first place rather than have to pick up the pieces after.

Those are my thoughts. :-) Certainly not a conclusive solution to such a widespread problem among Christians today who are already living in remarriages. But perhaps we can begin to make a difference for the generations to come so that they will be able to fully experience God's blessings as they live according to His design for marriage.

 

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